The 2 Ways of Facing F.E.A.R. when Your Future is at Stake
In life we come across with situations which are not necessarily in the brink of life or death; but our action will determine our future.
It’s up to us if we:
F.E.A.R. - Forget Everything And Run.
F.E.A.R. - Face Everything And Rise.
Read on the two life-changing short stories of two students, which will make you realize what actually is better to do when it comes to overcoming your fear when your future is at stake.
Forget Everything and Run
Michael was a student of business studies dreamed of becoming a famous writer/blogger. He decided to pursue journalism as his career.
However, there were problems with his attitude.
He questioned his abilities all the time.
He wrote a number of articles, but just couldn’t get them better.
He feared of getting negative remark always.
He feared of earning a bad grade and criticism on his written articles.
His teachers were right --- the reason he isn’t able to come up with his ability is the lack of self-esteem. He must believe in himself. He must believe in his abilities. He must believe in his dream. But…
He feared failure.
He feared rejection.
He feared asking his counselors.
He feared looking stupid and the feeling of being ignorant.
He needs inspiration from people, from a role model, from a celebrated author, from a bestselling author, but never sought for it.
He began to lose temper. He began to lose focus.
Like a boat without a rudder, he wandered into the ocean of nothingness.
Michael forgot his dream to become a famous writer, and soon vanished into oblivion.
Face Everything and Rise
No matter how strong we are, there is still something out there that we fear and for Michelle it was the Law School Aptitude Test to get into Harvard.
Being a Harvard Law School graduate was what she had always wanted.
Michelle was an extraordinary student, who aced all her exams with flying colors. Since she started going to school, nothing stopped her to pursue her dream to become a lawyer.
She grew up hearing that all the well-known law firms only hire Harvard grads and she decided to become one.
But, she was also scared to take the aptitude test, which would decide a Yes or No to her admission.
What if I fail? She often wondered. Her friends boosted her moral, told her she was good enough, but something scared her so much. It was the fear to fail and to lose.
Too much stress got into her physically and emotionally. She felt sick a week before the exam. She took the exam and felt she did a fair job.
Result came. She failed. She failed miserably.
She faced her worst nightmare and her dream was shattered. She thought she lost her only chance.
She lived the next 6 months wandering. Later she attended various motivational sessions.
She talked to friends and family.
She decided to give her dream another chance. This time her desire was so strong, and passion was unstoppable.
She believed that nothing can help her except herself.
She wasn’t scared anymore because she had already seen the worst circumstance.
She studied day and nights and sat in the exam with a winner’s attitude. Her abilities were at their peak.
Like a bird in the sky, she rose above her fears.
This time Michelle passed the exam. Tremendously with awesomeness. Aced it.
Fear is an emotional and psychological instinct of all humans. It is a feeling that is either positive or negative that is triggered by certain event when the future is at stake. The presence of fear is normal, and there are many ways to overcome fear.
You Create All Your Fears
Yes, you create your own fears in your mind. You create the negative scenario in the metaphysical. The metaphysical drives the physical. Guess what? Negative scenario in the metaphysical will result to negative outcome in the physical.
Slap yourself. Wake up. Come back to the present. Come back to your true self. Come back to your senses, your touch, smell, feelings, and sight.
Now, close your eyes, and visualize a good outcome. Visualize what you want that will give you the metaphysical boost to get your desired outcome in the physical.
When visualization is not good enough, talk to yourself. Talk to yourself in a very positive way in your mind, or talking it out loud.
If you are inside the car, you can even yell. Just make sure the windows are shutdown, so that no one will notice that you are nuts. By yelling, you are releasing the tension in a good way.
Finally, breathe in easily, and then say, “I’m great, and I can do anything with my strength and abilities.”
Realize that everyone is afraid, too. The playing field is level for all. So, if you replace those negative thoughts with positive thoughts, you are way ahead of everyone.
Being a Christian has a huge benefit because by believing in the Most Powerful Being, the Creator of Heaven and Earth, and the Giver of Life; the Most Powerful Being is in your side. If God is for us who can be against us.
When you are afraid, you can talk to Him 24/7, anytime, anywhere.
Prayer is the method to communicate with Him. Ask what you want, and He will give. That is why He is also called the Divine Providence.
In the morning before you drive out to your job interview, exam, or your destination, say your prayer, and then end it with a positive self-talk of “I can do everything through Christ who strengthens me.”
Analyze Your Fears
The most common fear is rejection.
Tell yourself, “This fear can’t be true. This fear of rejection is an illusion.”
F.E.A.R is False Evidence Appearing Real.
If you analyze rejection, there’s really nothing there. So, what am I scared about if I ask for something?
A “NO” will not make you bad or worthless or inadequate. A “NO” will not affect anything because you remain the same like before you ask. Rejection will not change anything. You just move on.
Instead think about, what is the BEST (note: I’m not using the negative word ‘WORST’) thing that can happen?
So, yeah… What is the BEST thing that can happen?
A “YES” can be life changing. It would mean a lot of thing, but you will never know if you did not ask in the first place.
Practice yourself by completing these set of phrases:
If I’m willing to ask what I want, I…..
If he/she thinks my needs and wants are important, I….
If I believe what I really want, I…
It will be helpful, when I…
Feel the Fear
“Life is Short” said Reebok. Nike exclaimed, “Just do it”. And, Elsa in Frozen sang, “Let it go!”
You will overcome the fears when:
You let it go, and just do it.
Life is too short if you will not give your dreams and desires a chance.
When you clearly see the positive outcome of your courageous attitude and effort, nobody can stop you.
Do it anyway.
Your action will definitely conquers fear. Period!
Find a small, simple, nonthreatening ways to build your confidence slowly. Break the bad habit by taking small but continuous improvements.
Slowly get out from your comfort zone. Be conformable in uncomfortable situations.
Surround yourself with positive people to support and nurture you.
Permit yourself to be awkward, and don’t be too hard on yourself.
Name any expert or champion in any field of endeavor or sport?
They all started as a newbie, awkward, and slow. However, they are unique and special like YOU! And by incremental change, they become who they are today.
Start slow. When you wake up tomorrow morning, exhale, “Everyday, I’m getting better and better.”
Then Week 1: “Everyday, I’m getting better and better. Stronger and stronger.”
Month 1: “Everyday, I’m getting better and better. Stronger and stronger. Smarter and smarter.”
Month 2: “Everyday, I’m getting better and better. Stronger and stronger. Smarter and smarter. Wiser and wiser.”
Month 3: “Everyday, I’m getting better and better. Stronger and stronger. Smarter and smarter. Wiser and wiser. Richer and richer. ”
By next quarter, you will be the most positive person in your family, in your community, and in your workplace. Your friends, co-worker and family will notice the NEW you. You can bet on it.
When You Ask
When you attain the courage to ask, ask with wisdom.
Be realistic. Be reasonable. Be specific.
Ask politely. Ask kindly. Ask with humor. Ask with creativity.
Be sure to ask in a right time and the right place.
Ask the person or people who are capable of giving what you want. If you want a raise, ask the boss not your co-worker. If you want a date, ask the girl, not your friend.
There you go! You got all the knowledge to be FEARLESS and CONFIDENT.
You are so ready my friend....
FEAR NOT and SOAR, and then celebrate the glory of your achievement.
Be grateful to all the people who help you along the way. Practice humility, be kind and generous.
Be thankful to God for all the opportunities and challenges that He throws at you.
Thanks for reading.
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